But more often than not, her eyes wander to her cell phone and then meander to the people behind him.

In fact, just about everything in her environment seems to enthrall her except for him, causing a billion and one insecurities to snake into his mind, such as…

1). She must think I am ugly as sin.

2). Does she find me as boring as Velveeta cheese?

3). Do I have the personality of a houseplant?

4). Did I forget to wear deodorant?

5). Is my ego going to be an obituary in tomorrow’s paper?

And if he’s bitter, he might think: She’s like a warm toilet seat – some guy was there before me, another will be there when I get up.

Like a hard working mule, he takes one last crack at making conversation.

But, alas, she stings him with, “It was nice meeting you but I have to go.”

In retrospect, he may think: Damn! That fall-asleep boring conversation piece took the pickup to a crippling halt. It was like the one unlucky drink that shoves a wavering alcoholic off the wagon. I should have never used it.

Most of us have experienced something along these lines.

Many of us have thought: If I only had more interesting things to say, do, or show women, my outcome with them would be completely different.

Although there may be a speck of truth here, most great orators, politicians, and salesmen will tell you, “The content of what you say is far less important than how you say it.”

I’ve seen comedians put an audience in stitches one night yet bomb the next. While the standup routine they used was exactly the same on both nights, their delivery was completely different.

For this reason…

You won’t learn any interesting conversation pieces, cute lines, or fall-on-the-floor-laughing jokes in this article.

Instead…

I’m going to teach you a communication secret that captivates women.

But before I go on, I want you to make me a promise (and, as you’ll see in a few minutes, this promise is for your own good)…

No matter how boring you think you are (even if you think you’re more boring than a 90 year old woman living in a nursing home), I want you to promise me that you won’t change the content of what you say to women for one week.

Here’s why…

I want you to see how adding just this simple secret to what you currently do and say when interacting with women can dramatically increase your success.

In school, you’re taught to finish a thought or idea before moving onto the next. Great advice if you want to plunge women into a narcoleptic stupor.

But if you want women to hang onto your every word, you need to break this crippling habit and start using nested loops.

A nested or open loop is when you start an idea, thought, or story, and instead of finishing it, you move onto something else. In other words, you keep the loop open.

Whenever the human mind is presented with an open loop – unfinished idea, thought, or story – it seeks closure.

Open loops are a form of what I call “tension loops” because they create unresolved emotional tension in a woman.

Even if a woman finds you as interesting and attractive as a sewer rat, the open loop unconsciously compel her to hang onto every word that pours out of your lips and emotionally drives her to see you as a valuable Prize.

Because she seeks resolution to the tension you’ve sparked in her mind and knows that you can release the tension, she perceives you as having value and heeds close attention to everything you say.

Imagine a slovenly bum and a high maintenance babe crossing paths. The bum makes a tragic try at conversation with her by saying, “Hello. My name is Jack and I am homeless. Let me tell you about how I became homeless.”

Chances are, she’d have no interest and scurry off because she finds him aesthetically repulsive, possibly scary, and of little value.

But if he fired an open loop at her, such as, “You know what they say about women with green eyes?” he would probably spark unresolved tension in her body. She’d feel a yen for emotional closure. Closure only he has the power to bring her.

And bada bing, bada boom…

This vagabond she normally would never give the time of day to piques her interest and has value (or Prizability) in her eyes.

Furthermore, open loops can build sexual arousal…

When you spark emotional tension within the context of flirting with a woman it becomes sexualized in her body.

But there’s a facet of open loops I haven’t mentioned yet…

It’s called the “Zeigarnik effect.”

One of the early contributors to Gestalt psychology Bluma Zeigarnik noticed that waiters remember orders up until they serve the food. Then they forget. This led to the discovery that the mind retains the most information when a loop is open.

How does this help you? A woman will probably remember everything you tell her between opening up a loop and closing it.

I want to share with you a powerful application of open loops I learned from watching politicians…

Oftentimes, when politicians are asked a question, they skirt around it for several minutes, talking about almost irrelevant topics, before directly addressing it. This keeps the listener in suspense.

How can we apply this to seduction and attraction?

Here’s an example…

When most men meet a woman they utter their name and then shake the woman’s hand. Usually that’s it. The interaction is over.

An hour – or even a few minutes – later she probably won’t remember his name or anything about him.

Instead, when a woman asks me my name I use an open loop.

I may say,

“When I was a kid my mom told me that she and my dad originally named me Arete, which means all the qualities that make up someone with good character.

And I said, ‘Wow, mom… that’s awesome! Why didn’t you keep the name?’

And she said, ‘Well honey, you’re lucky we didn’t name you Arete because it’s the name of a goddess from Greek mythology.

But we didn’t really give a crap about you having a female name.

The real reason we didn’t name you Arete was that our dog was named Arete – we really loved the name.

And on the day you were born our dog was hit by a car. When we looked at you, we didn’t want you to remind us of the dog. So we named you Josh instead.’”

In lieu of giving her the instant gratification of learning my name I’m using an open loop. This builds unresolved tension inside her body.

Her unconscious mind seeks to bring closure to this loop, inciting her to hang on to my every word.

Had I just told her my name from the get go, she might have judged, “This average looking guy probably lives a boring life,” and then moved onto another man.

But by using an open loop, I had an opportunity to demonstrate that I come from cultured people, have a sense of humor, tell great stories, and possess value (or Prizability).

Plus, due to the Zeigarnik effect, she will remember that I was the guy almost named Arete.

Josh Lubens, a relationship coach, write under the penname Swinggcat and has been teaching men how to attract women for the last decade. Visit his site if you’d like to get a world class education on how to attract women.

Next, he went in for the kill. But a few seconds later, he went belly up as she flattened his ego into a pancake.

He scurried off with the imperative of a gazelle that knows it’s minutes away from becoming a lion’s dinner.

You can probably relate. I know I can. I’ve been there about a billion times. Heck! – I used to be so scared to approach an attractive woman that I’d imagine her steamrolling me, leaving me for road kill in her wake. How cool is that – I’d disqualify myself without even talking to her.

If you never learned how to pick up women, then doing so can seem more challenging than climbing Mt. Everest.

Here’s the thing: more often than not, men pick up women for their beauty alone – and women are well aware of this. They can entrap a man without making a single peep.

Half the time, even if you find them as attractive as a dingle berry , they’ll still think you’re interested.

But this, my friend, is about to change…

Catching a glimpse of the average man approaching a woman is a grizzly sight to behold. Think of the woman as a skilled fisherman with something irresistible hanging from her pole and the guy as a dumb fish who’s minutes away from being turned into her dinner.

Even if he’s a fighter, it’s too late – he’s already on the hook (albeit, if he happens to be her physical type, he’s got a shot at success).

Like other men, I’m also a fish – but a Parana jacked up on steroids. The moment they think they’ve hooked me in, I cast my pole and tempt them with irresistible bait.

They start chomping away at the bait and, then, bam – they’re on my hook and I’m reeling them in.

Let me give you an example. If I’m at a nightclub, I may stand in a crowed area – maybe near the bar or ladies restroom. As a woman walks by I’ll stick out my elbow making it inevitable that she’ll bump into it.

And then I’ll bark, “Ow… you hurt me.”

Almost always , the woman will put her paw on my shoulder and say, “Oh my… I’m so sorry.”

I’ll tease, “You can touch me but first you need to tell me an interesting story or a funny joke.”

This emotionally hooks the woman into an interaction with you.

Once most guys find a woman attractive – usually within the first few seconds of meeting her – they start thinking of ways to get her approval, win her over, and prove themselves to her.

She’s got them on her emotional hook (and she’s well aware of it.) Any effort on their part to win her over is a bad sign she’s reeled them in even closer.

But I did the opposite: I set the frame that I’m the Prize and she’s the suitor trying to win me over.

Here’s a universal truth about dating and attraction: In every male-female interaction, only one person can be the Prize. Two people can’t chase each other at the same time.

There are exceptions but, generally speaking, you want the woman chasing you as a Prize she is trying to win over.

Josh Lubens, a world famous dating expert, writes under the penname Swinggcat and has coached men how to pick up women for over ten years. On his website, you can get free pick up lines that actually work.

Attractive women are almost never at bars alone. Instead, they’re surrounded by an army of people.

You may approach a sexy girl with ease. But if you don’t know how to woo her friend, they’ll drag her away from you.

Here’s a simple way to infiltrate her social circle…

Ask the group of women for their opinion on something.

If you do this correctly you will engage the whole group in conversation and become part of her social circle. Here is a simple example authored by Neil Strauss

Say to the group, “Guys… I want a quick opinion on something.” When you get their attention say, “Who do you think lies more – men or women?”

This will get everyone yapping.

Then ask, “Do you think men or women are more likely to cheat on their partners?”

Her male friend will averse, “Women.” Her girlfriends will disagree and say, “Men.”

This sparks a heated debate amongst the group. And guess what, my friend?

You instantly become the ringleader of the group. So you have the power to take the conversation in any direction you choose.

More importantly, if you hit on their friends, they won’t care because they’ll see you as part of their social circle.

One last point: your energy level needs to be a little bit higher than the group. Otherwise, you will bring down their energy level and they will get bored.

Likewise, if your energy level is too high, you’ll jar them.

Either way, they’ll ask you to leave.

Here is your homework: Think of five interesting questions you can ask groups of people. These are your conversational gambits.

The next time you are at a bar or nightclub and spot a woman you would like to meet, approach her social circle with one of these gambits. I think you’ll be surprised how well it works.

Have you ever been at a bar, seen a sexy vixen you’d like to talk to but didn’t know what to say? Most men have. If you’d like to learn how to pick up women in bars then go here to learn how to pick up women . You’ll thank me later.

You find a woman physically attractive.

The only problem is…

She isn’t physically attracted to you.

Is there anything you can do about it or are you out of luck?

Most dating experts will tell you, “If a woman isn’t physically attracted to you, move on.”

Don’t do this. You are cutting yourself short.

Regardless of your physical appearance, you can use a few simple psychological tricks to generate attraction in her.

One of my favorite is called a “Tension Loop.” It was invented by the world famous seducer Swinggcat.

A Tension Loop is when you do something to create unresolved tension inside a female, increase it, release it by bringing closure to it, and then spark it all over again. This will keep her feeling the emotion of wanting and reaching and chasing for more of you.

Soap opera writers use Tension Loops to keep women enraptured in their fictitious dramas for months – sometimes years! The structure is always the same. The soap starts off with some form of conflict or drama, sparking unresolved emotional tension. Emotional tension increases up until the point of the climax. The tension, then, is released by bringing some resolution to the conflict or drama. And, finally, the show ends by sparking the tension all over again, compelling women to tune in for next week’s show.

Within the context of dating and flirting, this tension becomes sexualized.

My favorite Swinggcat Tension Loop is Push-Pull.

Push-Pull is whenever you emotionally Push a woman away from you and then emotionally Pull her back in.

Each Push sparks emotional tension and each Pull releases it.

Let’s look at an example…

Compliment a woman with, “You have the most stunning smile I’ve seen tonight.”

She’ll flash an even bigger smile and say, “Thank you.”

Then say, “Actually you have the fourth best smile I’ve seen tonight. I’m gonna call you number four.”

She’ll demand, “But I wanna be number one.”

Say to her, “Wow. You’re a fighter. I’m promoting you to number three.”

She may whine, “But I wanna be # 1.”

Caution, “If you keep complaining I’m demoting you back down to number four.

If you want to learn more Seduction Tips, I recommend visiting Swinggcat. The man is a true master of Seduction.